First it was just Jack and me awake. We had some cake. I fed Max. Then Lauren woke up. She took an Ativan, just in case. Then she started not feeling well, so I woke up Shane.
It’s early enough to go to the doctor’s so I guess that’s what we’re going to do.
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At 2:00am, Lauren woke up and was moaning and sick to her stomach. I wanted to cry. Somehow, she got back to sleep..
At 4:00am, Shane woke me up because he’d thrown up in his bed.
It’s 5:47am. I’m the only one awake. Please be okay, everyone.
It’s 10:05pm right and Lauren has stayed asleep. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?
Olivia was hungry and that skinny girl loves her some fried chicken. I’ve had a few recipes that I’ve wanted to try from John Edge’s great book but Lauren has always nixed them. Too greasy. Too messy. Just no.
But Lauren’s sleeping peacefully.
One of my short term goals is to modify some of my eating habits. I’ve been doing it a little the past couple of days, drinking smoothies and thereby getting in some fruits and vitamins. Turkey burgers instead of hamburgers. But what better way to embrace my own contradictions then to make the Serbian Chicken recipe from the Fried Chicken, where the key to the flavor is to fry the chicken in a combination of lard and bacon grease?
I fried up a pound of bacon. We already had lard from a valiant effort Lauren made a few weeks back to cook Jamacian Beef Patties. Olivia, rail thin as she is, also loves bacon. Then I dredged chicken thighs in flour, then eggs, then bread crumbs and carefully lowered them into the lard and bacon grease.
Serbian Chicken I Made – Grease Is The Word.
Shane was out for a couple of hours but got home just after I had the chicken cooling and de-greasing a little. He, Olivia and I all agreed it was yummy.
Here’s the Tao part. One idea I’ve really been thinking a lot about is this idea I picked up from one of the Tao books on a work method of prepare, do the work, clean up. I’m personally really good at perpare, okay at do the work, and weak at the clean up. I’ve been seeing them as all one thing lately, though. It’s all part of the process and accepting that and acting on it is a good way to keep things in balance.
Which is another way of saying I did the dishes and Shane helped put everything away. There’s chicken to eat tomorrow in the fridge and almost no other trace. Except a pan full of grease, which I’ll take care of tomorrow when it cools down, I promise.
The Natives Grow Restless
Lauren seemed to be getting some fitful sleep, then at about 7:15 she woke up and then threw up. I need to go back and count, but that must be at least the 15th time she’s thrown up today. I think the Ativan stayed down though.
She asked me to come over and sit by her and rub her head. I pushed the hair off her forehead and it occured to me to pray a little for her, in whatever way I pray since I don’t believe in a ‘person god’ that takes requests and does magic tricks. That doesn’t make prayer meaningless for me, though. Prayer is good thoughts and reflection and that’s not meaningless at all. I told her I was going to pray for her and I thought about it and I prayed to be a better husband for her. Like penny wishes you shouldn’t tell, I’m not getting into details but there’s cleary room for improvement.
It’s the seven o’clock hour and the little kids fight like clockwork every night. I brought them into the living room and they watched cartoons and grabbed each other and blamed each other for not being able to see and they were both right.
Shane needed a break and so I sent him off to Starbucks with five bucks, a pad he writes his thoughts and song lyrics in, a pencil, and a bunch of MP3s of songs with banjo in them by Neil Young and Sufjan and Everclear.
Lauren’s asleep now and peaceful and I hope it lasts until she wakes up and feels better.
technorati tags:panic, attack, anxiety, ativan
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Lauren’s really really in bad shape. A couple of hours ago, she was like an animal that needed to be put to sleep – completely out of control in pain. Then she got some sleep and now she’s up and she’s bad again.
I called the pharamacy at about 10am to have them call Kaiser to get Ativan. They called at 10:30am. I called back at about noon and called Kasier myself. I just called Cost again and still nothing. Now I’m on hold with Kaiser. All we need is for a doctor from Kaiser to call Costco and authorize the perscription, which Lauren has had before. That’s it.