HOLLAND, MICHIGAN — Speaking to a packed auditorium presumptive Democratic Party nominee Barack Obama announced that he intends to nominate Illinois Senator Barack Obama as his vice presidential running mate. Candidate Obama praised Senator Obama’s judgment, energy and commitment to change in announcing what he called ‘the dream ticket that’s such a dream that you keep hitting the snooze button just to keep on dreaming it.’
“Choosing a vice president is the first major decision any candidate makes and I’ve spent several months trying to choose somebody with a resume, intellect and temperament that I respect. It’s become clear that that person is Barack Obama,” said Barack Obama. After a wild ovation, Obama gave a full throated endorsement of Obama while maintaining that selecting Obama was Obama’s first move in selecting a ‘cabinet of rivals’ which many Washington insiders suspect could include a nomination of former Illinois state senator Barack Obama for Secretary of State or the selection of best selling author Barack Obama for Attorney General.
“Yes, we have differences; take our positions on NAFTA, ” said Obama. “Consider Senator Obama’s strong and principled opposition to the bill that gives immunity to telecom companies; the very bill that I’m about to vote in favor of this coming week. Or contrast my own deeply held faith with Senator Obama’s respect for science.”
“So, we’re one — but we’re not the same,” said Obama as Obama nodded in agreement. “Senator Obama often quotes the beautifully reasoned lyrics of Neil Peart from the Canadian power trio Rush; ‘The differences leave room for you and I to grow.’ To put it another way, I like to quote Sly Stone; ‘I want to thank you faloettinme be mice elf agin.'”
Responding quickly, Republican presumpter John McCain quipped that “Obama and Obama seem to be running for Barack Obama’s first term” and then proceeded to chuckle at his own comment for an amount of time that several observers called “uncomfortably long.”